If your partner frequently starts stories with, "Did I tell you this already?" it could mean they're having trouble keeping track of multiple confidants, says psychologist Colleen Long, PsyD. If your SO is once again hitting the gym after a hiatus or buying new clothes outside of their usual style, they could be in an early stage with someone else or even dating more than one person, says Madden.īy Glamour They forget what stories they’ve told you. They’re paying more attention to their looks. But sometimes the reason things seem to be looking up after a rocky period is because the cheater decided to stop putting in the work into your relationship and have their “needs,” however ridiculous that sounds, met elsewhere. Madden's clients are often surprised to find their partners are cheating because they thought everything was going well around the time the infidelity started. Your typical relationship issues seem to disappear without an obvious answer for why. She typically sees this happen in situations in which the cheater feels they're falling in love with their cheating partner, since they have a sense that their affair is happier than their relationship with their significant other. They’re suddenly hypercritical of you.Ĭheaters will sometimes try to justify their actions by making their relationship out to be so bad that they had no choice, explains Madden. Of course, it's possible they've just been doing their research-in which case, great if you're into it-but other signs of cheating combined with a very noticeable sudden change in your sex life could mean they're picking up those new techniques from someone else and discovering new things they like, says Milrad. But if you share a financial account, what you can follow is an unusual spike in ATM withdrawals.īy Irina Gonzalez They’ve got new sex moves. They’re taking out a lot of cash withdrawals.Īnother telltale sign: Cheaters often use cash when they take their secret partners out so that their SO's can't track where they've been via credit card, says Rhonda Milrad, founder and chief relationship advisor of Relationup. It could also be a genuine reaction to them realizing that since they got away with cheating, you probably could too. It puts you on the defensive so you don't have the chance to consider the opposite possibility, and it makes your partner look so anticheating that they couldn't possibly do it to you. They regularly accuse you of cheating.īeyond being classic projection, this gaslighting tactic serves two purposes, says relationship expert and infidelity coach Caroline Madden, LMFT. And if you read the below and find yourself wondering how to break up with your partner, we have a guide to that too. The following red flags aren't meant to be alarmist-almost all of them can have alternate explanations, so there are no guaranteed signs of cheating-but if your gut is really trying to tell you something, they could prove useful.
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